Dakarai Molokomme, a 15-year-old starving child from a small village in Zimbabwe, has just told Madonna, one of the most famous pop stars in the world, to go and f*** herself, the local media are reporting exclusively.
“Yes, it’s true, I told Madonna to go f*** herself. Do you want to know why?” Dakarai asked. “It’s the same thing every time with these snobby rich Americans. Every once in a while they come to show us their support for the so-called eradication of poverty by adopting a child from a starving family, but they actually do more harm than good. Transracial international adoptions are part of the white savior industrial complex,” Dakarai explained.
In further discussions with journalists from the media, the kid stated that “none of the children here actually want to be taken away from their family and friends so they can be displayed as some kind of trophy in the homes of self-righteous singers or actors who want to score some points with the media and Oprah.”
“If they really want to help us, they should get Big Pharma to ship us some anti-retroviral drugs for the AIDS epidemic, or build schools and hospitals. If they don’t want to do that, then they can all go f** themselves!” the child told reporters.
The 15-year-old also stated that he would say the same thing to any one of those American or European “faux humanitarian posers”, except for Bono, whom he said he would also kick in the groin.
“Bono’s efforts to save the African savage from itself prove that the colonial imperative is alive and well,” Dakarai said as he walked with other village children collecting sticks to build a tree fort.
THIS IS THE RAWEST 15 YEAR OLD ALIVE
This is hilarious, pfahaha. I doubt that it’s real though.
I will also say that the writer used some loaded, value-laden language here. “Poor” is a value judgment. Are there international standards of wealth and if so, what makes this particular child any poorer or richer than her peers? What requirements must one fulfill in order to be “poor” or “rich”? And what of the descriptors, “small village” and “starving child”? Loaded, value-laden vocabulary. I admire the interviewee’s sentiments, but the reporter, in a way, did exactly what the interviewee denounced. In depicting him as this noble youth who is, “poor”, “starving”, and a “villager”, they sensationalize the story and place this child on a pedestal of sorts, deifying him for being so brazen with his opinions and not for the points he does make. The focus is then shifted to how “raw” this character is instead of the issue he presents. “Trophy of the self-righteous” indeed.
And right now I’m kind of glad that I don’t have many followers because I just woke up from a nap and I say silly things when I’m groggy. Yay TOK! We just started the language unit ^_^
You played the pokeflute!
LILI woke up!
LILI used REST!
LILI is FAST ASLEEP!
I probably won’t be able to sleep much tonight either. When the school day ends tomorrow, I will sleep all through the week and the weekend. I will emulate my idol, the great Snorlax, who wined and dined and slept like majesty. Passers-by will revel in my mastery of sleep and serenade me with their Pokéflutes and that will be okay, because I will not wake. Not until I have gotten enough sleep. My snores will be heard far and wide!
The thing I said earlier about sleep deprivation making everything funnier? It definitely applies here. You lose your filter, if only for a minute. You will be incapable of forming coherent sentences, and that is alright, my brother. That is quite alright.
I finished my essay!
Not really ):
But sort of! Maybe?
I’m so screwed.
At least I survived the night.
20 MINUTE NAP IT IS.
Holy Extended Essay, Batman! What do we do now?
I could reflect upon my procrastination… again… but I’m too tired and weary to do so. I’m not sure if I’ll be able to sleep tomorrow night either and I’m not sure how long I’ll be able to keep this up. Thankfully, I won’t ever have to find out because Wednesday is the last day of school.
THANK THE COSMOS, CARL SAGAN!
My tummy is a-grumblin’
It’s time for a midnight snack that will last me through the night!
No sleep tonight!
Wait, let make that into a haiku.
Dear grumbling stomach
The cookies won’t go in vain.
I don’t plan on sleeping tonight because of how much work I have to do and that’s kind of okay (: Tomorrow I will go to school without coffee and I will not crash and burn because I’ll be running on pure adrenaline.
To prepare for my night of scholarly shenanigans, I’m drinking a can of Coca-Cola while listening to a bit of Benny Benassi (don’t judge, I have my not-so-guilty guilty pleasures too ;D).
If anyone would like to discuss Anton Chekhov’s Three Sisters with me, feel free to send me a message!
It’s 12:34 (thank goodness it’s not 3:34) and I’m up again, procrastinating by complaining about my terrible procrastination habits. It’s unfortunate that I have such a short attention span, but it’s not an excuse and I will never let it become that.
I just remembered at 2:11 am that there will be a mock Calc BC exam later this morning. I don’t think it’s a good thing that I’ve already resigned to the idea of staying up all night to review for the mock.
Getting used to the idea of regularly staying up all night isn’t healthy at all.
Now where’s my coffee?